Leaving Religion in Canada
Religious context: Officially Christian-heritage and rapidly secularizing — Catholic (~30%, concentrated in Quebec), United Church and Anglican declining, growing "no religion" (~35%), substantial Sikh, Muslim, and Hindu populations in major cities.
Personal advice, not therapy. Email is free.
The Shape of Leaving in Canada
Canadian deconstruction has two main shapes. In Quebec, the Quiet Revolution of the 1960s did most of the work of secularizing French-Canadian Catholic families a generation ago, and the leaving that is happening now is often the second wave — grandchildren of cultural Catholics who never really practiced, untangling the residual guilt and the family Mass that everyone still attends at Christmas. In the rest of Canada, the most active deconstructions are coming out of the immigrant churches and mosques and gurdwaras of the Greater Toronto Area, the Lower Mainland, and Calgary, where first- and second-generation Canadians are leaving the faiths their parents brought from elsewhere.
There is also a Mennonite, Hutterite, and rural-evangelical exit happening on the Prairies that gets very little press but is real, and a steady stream of ex-Jehovah’s Witnesses across the country. Ex-Catholic Filipino-Canadian and ex-Catholic Italian-Canadian communities are large enough to have their own visible secondary networks of people who left.
The Canadian advantage, if there is one, is that the broader culture is pretty post-religious already, so the "what will the wider world think of me as an apostate" pressure is much lower than in the US South. The cost is concentrated in the immediate family and the immigrant community, not in being a public unbeliever.
Pillar Pages for Canada
Which tradition you came out of matters more than what country you are in. These pillar pages are written specifically for the religious traditions most present in Canada.
Leaving the Catholic Church
For ex-Catholics, lapsed Catholics, and people walking away from the church they were raised in. The guilt machinery, the family Mass, the saints you still half-believe in, and what comes next.
Leaving Evangelical Christianity
For people deconstructing from American evangelical Christianity, non-denominational megachurches, Southern Baptist, and conservative Protestant traditions. Honest writing about losing your faith, your tribe, and the certainty you used to have.
Leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses
For people who left the Jehovah’s Witnesses, are fading, or have been disfellowshipped. The shunning, the family that will not speak to you, the world after Armageddon never came. Honest writing from someone who walked an analogous road.
Leaving Islam
For ex-Muslims who left or are leaving Islam — including those who cannot say so out loud yet because of family, community, or country. Honest writing on apostasy, secrecy, and rebuilding a life when the cost is high.
Topics Most Relevant in Canada
The texture of the family rupture, the guilt, and the rebuild varies by country. These after-leaving pages tend to be the most useful for people from Canada.
When the family stops calling
For people whose family has cut off contact, formally or quietly, after they left their religion. The grief, the confusion, and what to do when the people who said they loved you stop showing up.
Telling your family you no longer believe
For people deconstructing who do not know how to tell their religious parents, siblings, or spouse what they actually believe now. Honest writing on timing, scripts, and what to do when the first conversation goes badly.
The guilt that does not switch off
For people who left their religion and still feel guilty for things that used to be sins. Why the guilt persists, what it actually is, and what reliably helps it loosen.
Raising kids without religion
For parents who left the religion they were raised in and now have to figure out what to teach their kids about death, ethics, meaning, and the grandparents who still believe. Practical, honest writing.
Cities in Canada
220 cities in Canada. The texture of leaving is often more local than national \u2014 leaving Catholicism in Salt Lake City is not the same as leaving the LDS Church in Salt Lake City, and city-level context matters.
Toronto
2.6M
Montréal
1.6M
Calgary
1.0M
Ottawa
812K
Edmonton
712K
Mississauga
669K
North York
636K
Winnipeg
632K
Vancouver
600K
Scarborough
600K
Québec
529K
Hamilton
520K
Brampton
434K
Surrey
395K
Laval
377K
Halifax
359K
Etobicoke
348K
London
347K
Oshawa
309K
Okanagan
298K
Victoria
290K
Windsor
278K
Markham
262K
Gatineau
242K
Vaughan
239K
Kitchener
234K
Longueuil
229K
Burnaby
203K
Ladner
200K
Saskatoon
199K
Richmond Hill
186K
Barrie
182K
Richmond
182K
Nepean
180K
Regina
176K
Oakville
166K
Burlington
164K
Greater Sudbury
158K
Abbotsford
152K
Saguenay
144K
Coquitlam
140K
St. Catharines
132K
Sherbrooke
129K
Lévis
126K
Kelowna
125K
Cambridge
120K
Trois-Rivières
120K
Guelph
116K
East York
115K
Kingston
114K
Moncton
109K
Sydney
106K
Milton
102K
Delta
102K
Dartmouth
101K
Thunder Bay
99K
St. John's
99K
Waterloo
97K
Terrebonne
95K
Ajax
90K
More in North America
From Canada? Tell Me What You Grew Up In.
What you were raised on. What started cracking. Where you are now. Be as specific as you can. I read every message myself and reply within a day or two.
Personal advice, not therapy. Email is free.